Want to Enjoy Long Life and Best of Health? Take Good Care of Your Spouse

Published March 25, 1988. There have been several reports recently that people who are happily married seem to be the healthiest. McClain Bybee, one of my neighbors, showed me an article not long ago that could give some clues as to why this is so.

The March edition of American Health magazine states, “There’s more evidence than ever that helping others has definite benefits for those who lend a helping hand. In an explosion of new research, the benefits of altruism – long practiced by moralists – are being proven by psychologists, epidemiologists, and neuroscientists.”

Anyone who is married is aware that marriage gives ample opportunity to do things for another person. The “Honey-Do” lists are a common source of humor among many couples – “Honey, do this,” or “Honey, do that.” Now it appears there are healthy benefits if “Honey does” – if requests are fulfilled in a genuine spirit of giving.

The article, titled “Beyond Self – The Immunity of Samaritans,” was not necessarily written with married people in mind. Single people also respond to the needs of others in a variety of caring ways. But marriage has a built in “caring clause” giving husbands and wives the opportunity to do things for each other in a way seldom found in other long-term relationships.

“Several studies,” the article states, “have shown that people need other people for their health’s sake.” At the University of California, Berkeley, researchers studied 5,000 residents of Alameda County for nine years and found those who were unmarried, had few friends or relatives, and shunned community organizations were more than twice as likely to die during that time as people who had these social relationships. This was true regardless of race, income, level of activity, and other lifestyle factors.”

Similarly, researchers at the University of Michigan found that “doing regular volunteer work, more than any other activity, dramatically increased life expectancy (and probably vitality). Men who did no volunteer work were 2 ½ times as likely to die during the study as men who volunteered at least once a week.”

Other research from the University of Michigan involved 2,700 residents in Tecumseh and found, “Those of us with many social contacts tend to live longer than more isolated individuals. In fact, even pleasant, relaxing activities may be bad for your health if they make you more isolated. People who spend a lot of time reading, listening to the radio, or watching television had a higher than-average mortality rate.”

If marriage does not provide us with an ample opportunity to serve others, then surely parenthood will. While writing this article I have been tending (I use the word cautiously) to Brandon, our 4-year-old. Between photographs I have helped him (1) get his bib-overalls undone, so he could go to the bathroom, (2) – helped dump dirt out of his shoes, and (3) fixed him two peanut butter sandwiches. Am I heading for old age or what?

Well do I understand the saying that parenthood is like being nibbled to death by little ducks. But according to “Beyond Self – The Immunity of Samaritans” in the March issue of American Healthy, responding to their little nibbles may actually keep us alive.

So serve well and live long.