How Many of You Would Marry the Same Person Again?

Published April 19, 1990. It is kind of concerning. The Utah County Journal ran a survey recently asking readers an interesting question. If they had a choice, and knowing what they now know, would they marry their husband or wife again?

The Journal ran this same (unscientific) survey a little over a year ago. As I recall, about 70 percent said “yes” and 30 percent said “no”. A few months later I was interviewed on KSL Television and we did a similar survey where viewers phoned in and stated “yes” or “no” to the same question. Our results in the informal telephone survey were about the same, with slightly more than 70 percent stating ‘yes’ they would marry the same spouse again.

What were the results last week to the same question in the Journal’s survey? Are you ready for this? This time only 60 percent said “yes,” and 40 percent said “no.” Is something happening in Utah Valley?

One might question the survey, the methods used, the randomness of the sample, and even the information generated. But the results do raise an interesting question. Just how many married couples are happily married?

During the past year or two we have been looking at new divorce statistics and projections. No more than half of those recently married are expected to divorce. In the past, successful marriages have been defined as those which are not legally terminated. But a little common sense, reason, and observation makes us aware that a couple can be married and stay married and yet not be very satisfied or happy with the relationship.

What would you say if we did our own survey? Take part in Brent Barlow’s Deseret News survey on “Would you marry your spouse again?” If you are currently married, just drop me an anonymous note or letter in the mail and cast your vote. Would you or wouldn’t you marry the same person again? And tell me in a paragraph two of the reasons why. (If you are remarried, the question pertains to your current spouse.) Please also indicated if you are male or female, the number of years you have been married, and whether or not you are in your first, second or even third marriage. Remember, this is an anonymous survey. I have a few hunches I would like to check out along with the results.

Let’s do one more thing. Why don’t you estimate what you think the results will be? Was the recent Utah Valley Journal survey accurate? Does it reflect the attitudes of other spouses in Utah? Will only 60 percent of respondents in my survey indicate they would marry the same spouse again? Is that percentage low . . . or high? You be the judge. Your response does matter. We’ve done these surveys before in my Deseret News column, and the number of respondents has ranged anywhere from six to 300. The results are more reflective and the overall population if the number of responses is high.

Send your responses within the next week to Dr. Brent Barlow, MARRIAGE SURVEY, Hartford Building, Suite 250, 3355 N. University Ave., Provo, UT 84604. We’ll wait for your responses and then publish the results in a future column.

For what it is worth, I am including my estimates of the results, the percent saying “yes” or “no”, with this column. It will be on one of the editors’ desks at the Desert News. I’m equally interested in what your estimates will be.

How many readers of this column would marry the same spouse again? Let’s find out. I look forward to hearing from you.