Grandma Day: She’s Why We Have Grandmas

Published January 25, 1986. During the school year 1984-85, our oldest son Doug was a senior at Orem High School. He and his grandmother, Alice Day, got along well because he was her first grandson. We knew Doug was planning to go on an LDS mission during the summer of 1986. And we didn’t know if Grandma Day, then 84, would be well enough to travel in 1986. So we arranged for Susan, Doug, Grandma, and myself to take a trip together during the summer of 1985.

Grandma Day had never been out of the United States. Since I was going to be in Great Britain that summer, we planned for Doug, Susan, and her mother to meet me in London in July. From there we planned a five-day trip to Ireland, where some of Grandma Day’s ancestors, the O’Neals, had come from.

Doug had saved some money, and so had Grandma Day.  Susan and I decided we would have to wait to finish the landscaping around our new home. But Doug and Grandma would probably remember a trip to Ireland together long after they would remember what kinds of shrubs and trees we had planted in our yard.

But in February, Grandma Day became ill, just four months before our trip. Early one morning about 2:00, I drove her to the hospital in American Fork. On the way she said, “Brent, I don’t think I’m going to make it this time.” I said, “Grandma, you can’t die until you go to Ireland this summer.” She smiled as one only can when in pain and said, “OK.”

We really didn’t know what was keeping Grandma alive, but she pulled through the sickness. So we went to the British Isles for 13 days. Most of the time Grandma could walk with her crutch, but we took along Uncle Ernie’s wheelchair for the times when she got tired.

The trip was worth every dime. You can’t always measure value with dollars. For us, it was particularly worth it to see Doug and Grandma spend some time together before he left.

Unknown to us, Grandma had another goal after her trip to Great Britain. She wanted to live long enough to see Doug leave on his mission. He would turn 19 in April 1986, so we knew his call would come sometime in early spring. It did. He was to serve in Guatemala and enter the Missionary Training Center in Provo in June. Then, in August, he would leave for Guatemala City.

Grandma Day didn’t say much during the summer. She attended Doug’s farewell and sat on the stand by him. They said goodbye the day before he went to the MTC. But we all knew that wasn’t the real goodbye; we would all have one more on August 6^th at the airport. So would Grandma Day.

His eight weeks at the MTC passed quickly. Then came August. We got Uncle Ernie’s wheelchair again and wheeled Grandma into the airport waiting rooms. There were lots of other missionaries and families there all waiting to bid farewell. We finally got our turn to tell our son goodbye. Grandma waited. She wanted to be last. It was time for Elder Doug Barlow and Grandma Day to say goodbye.

And they did. I will never forget it. The tall young man in his dark brown suit leaned over and put his arms around his grandmother in the wheelchair. She put her arms around him and they cried. So did we. They hugged each other for a long time. Then the final boarding call came, and Doug left.

Once the door to the plane closed, we started to walk away. But Grandma wanted to stay and watch the plane take off. So we stayed and watched. And Grandma cried some more. No one said much. No one had to.

This was the first Christmas for us to have a son or daughter away from home. Doug has been away six months. A few days ago, I was over at Grandma Day’s house. I went out to the woodshed to get her some wood.

When I came in, she asked how much it would cost to fly to Guatemala. I said I didn’t know but would find out. Then she said, “If I can live long enough, I would like to save some money to fly down and meet Doug when he gets off his mission.”

I’ve checked the airlines for the price of a ticket. I almost made a reservation for June, 1988. I think Grandma Day will be ready to go. It’s a long time from now, and she is now 85 years old. But she’ll probably make it. You see, I now know what keeps Grandma Day going.

Merry Christmas to everyone who has loved ones. Life truly offers many precious moments . . . many of which we share at this time of year.