Profile of a Loving Wife

Published May 28, 1981. A few weeks ago I assigned the single students in my marriage class to write a paper titled “What I am seeking in a marriage partner.” One fellow handed in his paper and it read. “Everything I want in a wife can be summed up in four words. Her name should be Farrah Fawcett Kimball Crocker.”

The Farrah Fawcett part suggests, well how can I say it, that she should be physically attractive. The “Kimball” aspect implies that she should have spiritual qualities (my student is LDS) and the last name, Crocker insinuates she should be able to cook like Betty Crocker of cooking fame.

What do husbands really expect in a wife anyway? Was my student unique? For some time now I have been working on the Profile of a Loving Wife, and I believe we are on to something. But the help of husbands in the Intermountain area is needed.

During my marriage seminar class last semester, the husbands were asked to write some things about their wives that they, the husbands, greatly appreciated. As the papers came in, the similarities were noted and compiled into a Profile of a Loving wife.

I now have a list of 20 such statements which are representative of what many men appreciate, and undoubtedly want, in a wife. Now I need to find out the order of importance. And that is where the husbands come in.

I could ask the husbands willing to participate in a little survey to write to me. But being a realist, I’m not going to do that. The last time we had a husband write-in on this column, I could have taken all the respondents out to lunch. So here is what I’m going to do.

I am going to ask that the women send for the Profile of a Loving Wife. I will send you (free) two copies, one for the husband to fill in and return, and one to keep. By completing the Profile of a Loving Wife, a couple will find not only the expectations of a husband, but also the order of importance. What’s more, a wife will realize that these expectations are some that many other husbands have as well.

What are some of the items contained in the Profile of a Loving Wife? A woman named Farrah Fawcett Kimball Crocker has many things going for her. Three of the elements in the Profile frequently reported by many husbands are

1. She is aware that her appearance and physical fitness affects how I feel toward her.
2. She helps me attain my spiritual needs.
3. She prepares nutritious meals and serves them in a pleasant atmosphere and surroundings.

Male-chauvinistic ideas? Before you write them off, talk it over. See if these are some of the expectations of the husband in your home.

If you, as a married couple, would like to participate in my survey, please write in. Send a long, stamped, self-addressed envelope. I will send you two copies of Profile of a Loving Wife. The husband (with a little help and encouragement of the wife) will anonymously fill out one copy of the Profile and return it to me within 5 days. The other copy he will review with his wife. After a sufficient number of the profiles have been returned. I will compile the results and present the findings in a future column. Please write in only if you are willing to return one copy.

And wives, when you encourage your husband to fill out and return the survey, be careful how you do it. Another item on the Profile is, “She is patient with me and does not nag or complain excessively.”