Published July 30, 1981. After graduating from college several years ago, I began my
teaching career at Davis High School in Kaysville, Utah. It was there that I
met Ken Sheffield who was just completing a long and successful career as a
teacher and administrator.
On several occasions my wife and I had the opportunity to
talk to Ken and Lucille Sheffield and were impressed with the enthusiasm and
zest for life they both had as they planned for retirement.
One thing we noticed about the Sheffields was the concern
and attentiveness they showed to each other as marriage partners. They confided
that they were particularly sensitive about the last words spoken to each other
as they parted each morning. What they said to each other at that time and how
they said it often set the tone for the whole day. And particular efforts were
made not to leave each other in the morning with negative thoughts or feelings.
As a newly married couple Susan and I thought the practice
was sound and tried to incorporate in into our own marriage. And most of the
time, we have been successful.
I read a poem the other day that reminded me of Ken and
Lucille. It was written by Margaret E. Sangster and is entitled “Our Own.”
If I had known in the
morning
How wearily all the
day
The
words unkind
Would
trouble my mind
I said when you went
away
I had been more
careful, darling,
Nor
given you needless pain;
But we vex our own
With look and tone
We
might never take back again.
For though in the
quiet evening
You may give me the
kiss of peace,
Yet
it might be
That
never for me
The pain of the heart
should cease
How many go forth in
the morning
That
never come home at night
And hearts have broken
For harsh words spoken
That
sorrow can ne’er set right.
We have careful
thoughts for the stranger,
And smiles for the
sometime guest
But
often for our own
The
bitter tone
Though we love our own
the best,
Oh, lips with the
curve impatient,
And
brow with that look of scorn,
'Twere a cruel fate
Were the might too
late
To
undo the work of the morn,
You may find, as Ken and Lucille Sheffield suggested, that
saying positive things to your husband or wife when leaving in the morning can
benefit the rest of the day.
And by following this practice during their marriage, Ken
and Lucille were the benefactors. Just a few months before retiring, Ken was
killed in an automobile accident at an intersection near Centerville.
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