Published
January 15, 1987. Like most other families, ours got together
over the holidays to do a little celebrating. My older sister Jane (Mrs. Lee)
Sorenson from Bennion and my younger sister Karen (Mrs. Lance) Schneider of
Sandy complained of the way I portrayed them in recent columns.
Once I stated that they picked up my
wife Susan and went shopping at the local mall. When they returned, I saw smoke
emerging from their purses from smoldering credit cards.
What is wrong with a statement like
that? Apparently, they got a little kidding from friends and neighbors. I
admit, however, that it is not true they formed a “Shop Till You Drop” club.
Perhaps they should.
I have often tried to explain to
Jane and Karen what it was like being the only boy with an older and younger
sister. Did the many times they made me “play house” and dress up in Mom’s old
clothes significantly affect my personality development? I sometimes wonder.
I’ve often tried, with limited
success, to convince them that brothers and sisters do make a difference in
each other’s growth and maturation. Furthermore, I believe that birth order
does make a difference in character development. But my efforts around the
dinner table to convince my two sisters of this have largely failed. They want
proof.
Well, Jane and Karen, the time has
come. In a recent “Marriage Encounter” magazine is an interesting article by
Kathy Kelly, “Birth Order: Does It Matter?” She describes some of the
characteristics of various children. I’m sitting here reading it now and trying
to decide if these characteristics apply to my family.
According to the article, these are
characteristics of the first child:
- Tends to try to dominate and control others. (Hmm . . .)
- Needs to be “right” most of the time. (Interesting . . .)
- Feels powerful, yet burdened with the responsibility for younger children. (Really . . .)
- Tends to develop a feeling of being a rather important individual.
- Is active, purposeful organized.
The
article cites the following characteristics of the third child:
You are probably wondering about the
characteristics of the second child. Let’s see, where did the article go? It
was here just a minute ago. Now I can’t find it. Maybe I can repeat them from
memory.
- Once a decision has been made, it cannot be changed. (That means stubborn.)
- Has trouble making choices.
- Can identify and assess issues, but rarely takes a stand.
- Has high tolerance of ambiguity.
- Overlooks details.
As I remember, the second child was
trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful,
thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent. That’s not exact, but they were something
like that.
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